not again

Ok..so i have decided that I just have to play is simple, er not to take it too seriously, since I have been this way for months now, I mean I have been dreeeeaming or being in the state of illusion that She knows seriously or deeply what i feel for Her, and until now, I do still like Her, but the problem is, after knowing She does not want to be courted I decided to stop it. since I respect Her and it could be annoying if I pursue it, right..

So...its just a waiting game, and its not that im waiting in vain, I`ll have to let things happen, if hopefully she`ll like me too as being me so it would be really awesome. I`ve tried to pretend to things that im not, but its really not proper, and yeah "just be yerself" <--ahh an old school quote and very applicable to any instances.

If given a chance...i can ask her personally if she wanted me to accompany her while waiting for her jeepney to arrive, but its really difficult, its so hard, i think i need to be drunk or a bit tipsy to have the guts to tell her this.

Ok.....so if I really like her, I can definitely wait for her after shift since she mostly go home late and do those things, well hell yeah i`ve thinking about it a million of times.but I cant its just that easy.I still dont have the guts though....maybe next time

P.S. Love to squeeze yer bubbly cheeks!

let`s move on!

Move on. A phrase, two words.... Easy to tell someone about this since yer not putting yerself in their shoes... as the famous Professor/Internet Action Star Mr. Ramon Bautista quoted "if cant move on,move on some more"

He has a point, why should you suffer in the same state when you can climb the next level....the thing is..moving on is not that easy especially when you`ve been thinking about someone almost everyday,just like in my case.. make this another confession of mine, i really have been thinking about her everyday ever since..so true. so this is why i find it so hard to master this moving on skills...sometimes I wished I never knew her, but past is past. <---this sucks

There are a lot of things I learned after my tragic relationship, I cant count them...but one thing for sure those were one of Gods`blessings to me...

....FREE....

I definitely do not know what should I blog today, I just feel like filling up my blog section....ok, how about what happened this week?or about Her.

Its been a roller coaster week for me, first...i`ve been suffering from flu and persistent cough...i stopped smoking for about 3 days, yes 3 days, awesome right?its because i cant breathe...and now im finally back to normal...and this is so not right.but il definitely try to taper off, like what most Doctors advised..smoke smoke smoke

And speaking of Her..yeah Her...why do i find it so hard to smile back at her...and i feel like that there`s already a gap between her and me...i dunno, maybe its only me feeling this way.I cant even talk to her straight or what...the inferiority complex always takes place. I feel like she`s not gonna take me seriously after all. How can be so sure?how pessimist i am... but i guess im already contented seeing her almost everyday, even if i don`t get to talk to her just her mere presence would definitely make my day.

Am I that desperate?...no im not, I finally have decided not to court her..why?... I have not fixed myself yet.Im under construction....i feel like there are a lot obstacles waiting for me, i should prove myself that i can handle everything and of with His help of course.

Its not that I dont like her anymore, nothing has changed of the way I feel for Her I guess, but I have to stop and think of myself first before venturing others lives...She is still the same pretty, charming and getting beautiful everyday...

remembering 9/11

That was 10 years ago when we thought the world is going to end, After watching the devastating events on television I thought it would be just easy for some terrorist to tear Philippines apart.

I was in 3rd year high school then, everything was not yet clear for me before, All I ever wanted is to have my own cellphone, I remember cellphones last 10 years ago was rare especially for high school kids, not like today everyone has it....and I got my cellphone two months after for my birthday, its worth the wait.

And I remember jamming sessions after classes. and 10 years ago that was the time i felt what they call "Love"....now cheers for celebrating a decade of craziness!!!!!!!